Corrections Needed
Greetings Xen, I have a few questions about your Wiki and your bio. With these questions, I by no means mean to insult you in any way or your creative skill, more so I either need clarification or merely corrections:
1. In your bio, you state that your mother came from a wealthy political family. Since this was before the Empire lost Coruscant, and it was the Imperial Senate, how did your family escape the prejudice that you would receive after the Galactic Empire’s loss at Coruscant? And why would they let a wealthy political Imperial family have a boy trained at the Jedi Praxeum?
2. Was Xen trained at the Jedi Praxeum or the Jedi Headquarters on Coruscant?
3. At 16 you said you were a Padawan, along with Angelina, and that you were not the best, but still skilled. If you and Angelina were the same skill level and Angelina was captured by a few thugs, then how did she manage to escape from you, her lover, without you noticing, and how were you able to decapitate the thug leader (after pointing him out so clearly) and her not be able to defend from them?
4. “Although Kilan had killed in a fit of rage, he was still able to be part of the Jedi Order.” How? Why? Why would Luke, whom almost killed his own father in a fit of rage, let someone who did kill in a fit of rage be let go? Any other number of force tricks would’ve helped, and if you couldn’t have done them, then I think two Masters of the Jedi Temple would have been able to dispose of them easily.
5. You also say you powered a rusty space ship with half of its crew missing through the Shroud? I don’t think that it would be possible to do that.
6. You just landed on Antei? With all the Brotherhood forces from all around the galaxy, you merely piloted through the Shroud and landed on Antei? I am sure that the Brotherhood’s defense systems worked a lot better than not at all?
7. You also say you merely beat a Jedi Master? Jedi Master = Dark Side Adept. As a Sith Battlemaster I could see you maybe pulling it off, but when you leave the Brotherhood, you are separated from your “home” and other things are distracting you, I don’t think it could be pulled off.
The rest of your profile seems realistic enough, plus overall it looks really good. If you have any questions feel free to ask :) Otherwise starts on those comments and corrections :)
Just a note too: some of the stuff might be passible, but others might not be.
Scyrone 20:52, 11 December 2009 (UTC)